Nathan alexander Landon came in to this world may 7th 2011 weighing 8LBS 1.2 Oz, My first born was completely different than any other pregnancy I have had and his birth has been the craziest as well.. it matches his personality as he is very stubborn and is only going to do anything by his will. I had gained 80LBs in my pregnancy , it was a lot for being a first time mom.. I really didn't expect gaining all this weight but I was willing to get it all off when he was born. it wasn't to bad until later in the 30 weeks of pregnancy I started having horrible stresses in my life and in turn this affected Nathan since my blood pressure wasn't going down , by 39 weeks my blood pressure had spiked to 160/110 and kept climbing. My team of doctors had watched me very closely near the end but things went calming down , the next option was being induced .. as natural as I wanted my labour it was something that wasn't happening .
I went in at 730am to get the induction under way .. they had given me medication to start softening my cervix , after this dose they sent me home to get some rest , I came back for the next dose 5 hours later to get my next dose which was about 130pm this time they told me not to come back for another 5 hours which was about 830 when the wanted me to get another dose but by this time I was 5cm dilated so they decided to keep me and break my water. I was finally excited that I was going to be a mom in a few hours.. I was so nervous and not to sure what to expect. I had prepared as much as I could . They had taken my blood just after I was admitted just in case something happened and I would need a blood transfusion. As they broke my water my contractions were coming closer and closer and were highly painful.. the worst pain I had ever felt so I had asked for an epidural to get some rest since I wasn't dilating anymore at that time. The doctor had come in 2 hours later to give me the epidural but it went all wrong when he used the longer needle instead of the smaller one thinking my spine was deeper than normal but it wasn't so he missed my spine and punctured my nerve in my back.
I was in so much pain from contractions and then the epidural going wrong I wasn't sure if I had enough strength to go through it again, but something in me told me to keep pushing through the pain I would be okay . The doctor tried it again this time with the smaller needle this time it worked perfectly I was able to lay down for about an hour and not feel the contractions that were coming on terribly strong. I was checked again by the nurses as they thought I would only be progressing a little more but I told them I had the feeling to push .. they got my doctor in as fast as they could as I was starting to push I couldn't wait anymore I was 10cm dilated and Nathan was ready to make his entrance to this world. I had pushed for 15 minutes which was going really well until Nathan being a bigger boy and having wide shoulders like his mamma , nearing the end his shoulder got stuck , I panicked ... the doctors suddenly start talking about needing to get ready a vacuum or forceps , this is something I never EVER wanted !!!! As I continued to panic the nurse started digging in some plastic I panicked even worse.. so I bared down and got the strength to deliver him naturally as much as I could he ended up ripping me pretty bad and I ended up almost needing a blood transfusion .
The doctors suddenly couldn't stop my bleeding ... I watched my mother stand at the back of the room with her hands over her mouth terrified as I was blacking in and out . I nearly lost my life giving my life for my child.. I was willing to if it meant that he lived and I didn't, I just didn't have a choice at that moment. I was terrified but I was ready. As 10 minutes passed .. it felt like eternity but the doctors had been able to stop my bleeding without needing to give me any blood. I was beyond lucky that my life didn't end that day and I was able to continue to live my life with my baby boy. If I had to leave this world at that moment I knew with all my heart and soul that at least I brought my baby boy to this world healthy. This bonded us more than mother and son.. we are connected and intertwined by a light that is unexplainable. After I was able to get home since all my blood loss I wasn't able to breast feed like I had wanted which defiantly made me feel like a failure , I was very tired since I was still loosing a lot of blood. I somehow found this strength inside me where I knew I was the only one Nathan needed at that moment and god was closely standing by watching making sure he gave me that light.
Nathan holds a special place In my heart , he was my first love and my first heartbreak.. but on the flipside he has given me the strength to live life better for him and I , he taught me to look at my world completely differently.
Nathan is now almost 4 .. he is still that stubborn little man , he is smart and keeps me on my toes but I wouldn't change a thing about him . I am thankful to be able to have him in my life.
28 year old Mom of 3 under 6 (2 boys 1 girl), TTC baby #4, Married to my soul mate, Photographer, nail artist, amazon reviewer, fashion addict, Looking to make a postive impact on this world one story at a time. I am looking to inspire people with love and peace