Tanner joined our family on June 12th 2013 @ 1:15pm 3 weeks early and weighing 7lbs 15oz,
The story starts with tragedy .. I got pregnant in the summer of 2012 .. overjoyed by the news , I found out I was 5 weeks ... my life at this time was still super busy , I had lived in another city without family and friends and didn't have my own family doctor not yet at least, so I had to wait for an ultrasound about 12 weeks .. I had have issues all along in this pregnancy.. for one my stress level was extremely bad , I kept spotting on and off without any pain throughout the whole pregnancy . I finally got my appointment in to see the baby to calm my nerves that everything was ok... but i knew deep down something was wrong.. just nothing felt right... I got my ultrasound and sadly their was no baby in my uterus ... doctors say the baby had absorbed back in to my body ... since i had no bleeding like a normal miscarriage. I was beyond devastated i didn't get out of bed for a week... i couldn't get my head around the fact that i couldn't change what had happen.. i blamed myself fully.
A month had passed and my period was suppose to go back to the normal like my doctor had told me ... but for some reason it didn't .. so i panicked thinking that their was a problem again ... my mind was wrapped in tons of thoughts .. thinking the thought of me having more children would be ruined if they couldn't figure out the problem.. I continued on with my life tried to push it back in my mind .... and another 3 weeks had passed ... i really figured why not take a pregnancy test for the hell of it.... this time i went directly to the doctor to find out for sure.. since i figured if i took the test that it wouldn't be accurate enough to give me a definitive answer. The doctor had come back with 5 minutes of the test .. he had a big smile on his face letting me know i was pregnant with my second child... i almost collapsed on to the floor.. i was so shocked ... i turned out to already be almost 2 months.. so that means i got pregnant within a month of my other pregnancy.
This pregnancy was my best pregnancy so far!!!!... i had little to no complications .. doctors seemed to try and tell me he had down syndrome near the end before i gave birth.. but i kept telling them my baby boy was healthy.. i could feel it .. i dreamt it .. i knew it.. i knew that my instinct was so much stronger than any advice they could ever give me.. after a few doctors telling me in the early weeks. to abort him since they really believed that their was something wrong with him.. I completely declined with every fiber in my body.. abortion goes against anything i am... religiously.. spiritually.. everything that makes me who i am .. i will never agree or support abortion.
The pregnancy went on and i connected with my little man more than ever...he was my second miracle ... i fell asleep at night holding my big belly knowing it was only me and mommy's little boys.... i prayed every night that he would be healthy and happy... I was willing to sacrifice anything i had to .. to become the best mother that i had to. Time went by so fast. 31 weeks had come and had gone.. i had moved in to a new home. i was still lonely but i knew my boys would keep my strong.. if in life it was only us two i was willing to accept that.
37 weeks had come and i expected that i would go the full 40 weeks.. i had no complications to show that it would be a problem.. I suddenly felt horrible like i was getting the flu... i had to get a babysitter for Nathan since i just couldn't even stand anymore.. i figured it must be a very rough flu that was going around and somehow i was the lucky one who had caught it.. but no one else in the home was sick.. i found this weird.. I had gone to my regular doctors appointment for 37 weeks.. and my doctor did a cervical check which was normal at this stage in the pregnancy
27 year old Mom of 3 under 5 (2 boys 1 girl), TTC baby #4, Married to my soul mate, Photographer, nail artist, amazon reviewer, fashion addict, Looking to make a postive impact on this world one story at a time. I am looking to inspire people with love and peace