In my past i had done things that are questionable like most teens or young adults out their, but when i did porn and video's and ran my own website having my own porn , when i left i had signed contracts that barred anyone involved from putting anything of me back online or sharing it without me knowing.. i could legally sue them if they did this.. For years i had nothing happen.. everyone left silently that was apart of it , even me , i moved on i grew up and it didn't bother me. I distanced myself from my clients and worked hard to get over my sexual addiction i had developed in enjoying what i did. I distanced myself from it all .. it was the easiest then explaining to everyone i met oh before you like me just let you know this one thing. I didn't want to label myself in that way.. so i put in a little box and never talked about it again..
I had gotten thousands of emails , messages and texts in my journey asking for photos i never gave and men listened when i said no or denied their request for whatever they were asking for .. they walked away .. i still felt like i was in full control , yes i did porn and basically selling it to make a living because i had to , to support my son , since his father was a loser. Men didn't take the no to bad some were angry .. some were upset but they let go.. i never felt bad saying no.. my choice was my choice.. but this one day I had gotten this email in my spam from this email i never heard before.. i was immediately suspicious .. the heading say do you remember me? .. I took hours of thinking who could be messaging me and i felt like it didn't matter so i figured i would open it and read it , then delete it . I opened the email and it said i have come back from the rigs , how r u ?.. Since i had slept and talked to a few men in the oil rigs.. in my city way north from us is deep in oil and people have many jobs up north surrounding this career it wasn't shocking to hear that someone had quit the rigs and had moved on with life. So i replied and said who r u ? I don't remember .. He then messaged back claiming that he was beyond angry at me and looking for forgiveness because i had slept with him and then i had dropped him in the middle of the street and told him to go play in traffic.. Now i will tell you when i got this message i was beyond myself and i questioned myself a million times.. how could i have treated a human being this way.. drunk or not this wasn't an excuse !!!.. I thought about it and thought about it.. since i knew that i was a drunk in my young days maybe ... possibly i did something like this.. i cried some more.. my mother told me this is bullshit don't answer but i had to see if it was someone from my past maybe i could apologize and make it right. So i continued to ask questions , i continued to try and get an answer to get him to reveal his identity.. but sadly i was met with oh that i hurt him so bad that he just was playing a game to try and get me to ask and ask and ask.. he even told me that he was so hurt that he said i killed his father .. i said how the hell can a nude picture kill your father.. obviously back and forth with this conversation i was getting to the end of my limits and really starting to believe it was a damn lie.. i eventually got to the point where he would tell me that i had to send him new naked photos .. or else my children would see what a horrible person i was.. he said that he wanted something that i had that he wanted for making him feel horrible. . he sent me back nudes (that were never sent to him, he stole them or hacked them from somewhere or someone who purchased them) , i decided to not go along with his bullshit anymore and just block him and don't answer him.. but he kept harassing me message after message wanting to make me pay for what he thought i did. I was taken back to this and for a week i really combed through my mind to find out if this was me or he got me confused with someone else in life. Usually i just don't care . and i don't really put emotions in to this bullshit.i kinda just let people kick themselves in their own face. I knew that this bullshit wouldn't end no matter what i did.. so rather than calling the authorities and having them do nothing.. i took it in to my own hands and got help .. to go under the name of a prominent hacking group that hacks for human rights.. and we started finding out details about this guy that were impossible that we ever met.. he was about 5" 6" 140 pounds.. lives over 3000 miles away from my city.. about 23 years old.. currently lives with his family.. (young siblings in the home), never traveled to my city, never met me, talked to me, never slept with him, never worked anywhere close to the oil fields. he just wanted money to get this . he wanted money to cover his child endangerment charges that got his son taken away a few years prior. We found out that his father passed away of a heart attack a few weeks as he was trying to attack me. Why i tell this story.. is because even though he backed off and i got a hold of the situation.. i never believed his story from day 1.. this helped me figure out that this was a lie.. but i could only imgaine what it would be like to be a young girl under 25.. who maybe did some questionable things in your life and suddenly this guy is coming at you and you don't want your whole life to crumble.. well guess what i write this story because i want to inspire people to always think of yourself when you are single.. and always think about your surroundings.. always have extra money to get in a cab , always look around when you get out so you know where you are.. even a street name helps.. I will tell you .. i never fully knew what people were paying for my nudes.. but i always did know that i always sent the photo.. with backgrounds you wouldn't know where i took the picture.. i would never have family or close friends in the photo or video so you could pick out where i was.. i always showed my neck down in most shots so you couldn't use it later against me.. I always checked my drinks and took them everywhere when i was in a restaurant or in a bar.. and if the staff said i couldn't take it with me somewhere within those walls i dumped it out.. no matter how much it costs.. those few moments of you dumping it out.. shows that you are always watching.. because the guys/girls who are going to do this are going to go with the ones who aren't watching.. who get to drunk in the bar.. who are dragging their feet.. who look lonely.. never ever be alone wherever you are.. always go with someone or a party of people. The simple steps can save you.. they saved me because these helped me know that i never was to drunk not to remember this massive story.. i hope that you have fun with life.. i hope you have a blast.. but always be aware that people are insane.. and even when you don't think they could possibly be .. they are.. this guy never got anything from me but a sore kick in the ass but if i was insicure or if i really truly paid this guy to leave me alone.. their would always be another guy/girl going to try this sceme.. the best way to pay off your bills.. get a job.. Always love your life.. and never let stupid people like this break you down.. i am way to strong for a 23 year old to try and wrestle me to the ground Enjoy XOXO Lola |
Lola28 year old Mom of 3 under 6 (2 boys 1 girl), TTC baby #4, Married to my soul mate, Photographer, nail artist, amazon reviewer, fashion addict, Looking to make a postive impact on this world one story at a time. I am looking to inspire people with love and peace Archives
June 2017
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